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Not Wrong…Just Different!


Hubby and I have been attending a Love and Respect (Emerson Eggerichs) class offered through our church. I bought the book and companion workbook last year so that we could go through it together but time got away from us (I managed to read through the first chapter) and the books sat on a shelf collecting dust.

Love and Respect from Amazon

Enter 2013.

Rich and I both feel we are called to the marriage ministry and want to become more involved. The leader suggested taking the Love and Respect class. I jumped at the opportunity to delve into the book and the principles therein.  There are several couples in the class. We watch videos of Emerson himself explaining the simple principle behind his best-selling novel: she desires love, he desires respect. This idea comes from Ephesians 5:33.

“However, each one of you [husbands] also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”

For those of you who don’t hold to Biblical truths, there is scientific evidence backing up this statement, actual research done by a doctor at the University of Washington. By studying couples from various backgrounds, he was able to break things down to two basic things that men and women thought they were lacking: respect and love respectively.

Here’s a little blurb from the lesson we had yesterday:

This book will not only help married couples, it can help with all sorts of relationships: dating, work, family, friends, school. It has far-reaching implications that can change how you treat people and how they will ultimately treat you. Even if you are not going through a rough patch, this book is still relevant.

Is this a magic book that will make your marriage perfect, unicorns prancing around, rainbows following you everywhere you go? Umm…no ;)

We are all imperfect people. You mix that together in a marriage, and you have the recipe for disagreements, anger, disappointment, hurt, misinterpretation. BUT with the tools in this book, you will learn to see your spouse in a different light, with the love, grace, and mercy that our Father is heaven looks on us though we fall short every second of every hour of every day. You’ll be reciting Emerson’s words of wisdom: Not Wrong, Just Different!

So what are you waiting for? Check out this great book/workbook duo! Have you done the Love and Respect study,  alone or as a couple? I’d love to hear from you!

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One Comment on “Not Wrong…Just Different!”

  1. violafury January 31, 2013 at 12:49 pm #

    This is great and so true. There was an article a few years ago here in Tampa. A man who is a scout for the MLB was talking about his marriage and it was hilarious. Both he and his wife had such divergent views of their relationship. She was very careful to make sure that she never, ever told him anything of any importance unless she had his UNDIVIDED attention. She had tried telling him one too many times while he was scouting during the evening sports, I guess and things went “awry,” to ill effect. So, this looks wonderful. Thanks, Dr. Fab!

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